An interesting subject yet not something we like to look at as it goes against the fairy tale
and all of the love myths! Yet it’s more common than we care to acknowledge or perhaps
even admit to ourselves. We may even be in a NSA relationship without having
labelled it as such. Shock and horror!
Boy meets girl and the social programme kicks into play, if there is a connection it gets explored.
But what if the connection is only sexual? We encounter so many potential “mates” as we
journey through life, all show us aspects of who we are. At any point in time we could put our
hand into a hat, pull out a name and do that aspect of us for a while, or at least until we
notice the compromise and try another aspect.
I feel a lot of relationships are formed on this basis, sadly, which is why there is so much
dysfunction, divorce and lonely dissatisfied people.
We all know that our primary relationship is with ourselves, that you are the beloved that you seek. Sort out this relationship and all others will be a reflection of it. While we are still a work in progress we will draw to us a relationship that will create friction where it is most needed to bring whatever parts of ourselves that need it into the light of consciousness. And so we grow and evolve, relationships providing a beautiful opportunity for enlightenment.
Going back to the line-up of 10 choices and choosing none. My sense is that while you have
a choice, not to choose any. Ideally if you could put them into a mixing bowl extracting a little of
this and some of that – the result would be the perfect fit!! It’s when you no longer have a choice
or rather don’t see any other choices, everything else simply falls away and becomes background noise, the choice is somehow made for you, hence no choice, this Other simply becomes what is.
Until then, if that now ever arrives, how do we play on the field of relating?
Our primal nature is unavoidably sexual, we are sexual beings it’s how we relate to life and how
we create our lives. Sex particularly for the goddess enhances her flow with life, gives her radiance, joy, vitality. Sex opens her to life’s greatest bliss, it gives her access to the cosmic heart and
the source of all feeling. For the god he gets strength and depth of presence in the world, he
gets life force and direction. He finds his purpose and holds her while she swirls out
among the stars.
Without the beloved other, how then do we show up as the god and goddess in life?
How do we experience our bliss and purpose? We could give ourselves this gift to an extent,
being fully in relationship with ourselves we have access to our open hearts and so a connection
to the divine. Obviously if we are in a relationship this is a given, but what if we are not?
Sex is one of those subjects that come with a lot of socially acceptable conditions and judgments. There are the rules of religion telling us how we can and can’t engage in sexual union.
And so we have a choice to shut down or remain true to who we really are.
Because of the sexual taboo in our culture, we don’t really talk about sex, it’s kept hidden and secret. As a result of this a lot of our shadow aspects get locked away inside our unexpressed sexuality.
Sex then has the potential to unlock our shadow and in so doing it increases our light.
We become more radiant.