Those 2 words go together, Trust and Love, the one being implied by the other. Without trust there is NO love. We can try and fool ourselves into believing there is but I promise there isn't. Any relationship based on an idea of love without trust is DOOMED !! DISASTROUS !! Cut and run NOW !
Once upon a time, many many years ago I got engaged for the first time to this passionate, intense, volatile man. Well, it had to be love, didn't it, there was so much intensity, obsession and possessiveness. Intense jealousy and ownership ! It felt good to be love in this hot fiery passion. The problem with hot passion is, it BURNS!
It took me a couple of years to free myself from this cycle, thank goodness, I set myself FREE.
He continued with his journey somewhere else, that world did not intersect mine until a few days ago. Cyberspace having turned the world into neighbors, a familiar name and face appeared on Facebook. On impulse I sent a friend request, really just out of curiosity as to where life had led him. In hindsight not a very smart move. He looks happy, just got engaged, lots of lovey dovey pics, smiles and cuddles.
Although something feels "Off", I look and feel and then close the connection. I didn't belong there, life was not heading that way. I dipped into the past and there was no appeal. And then....the new fiance sent me a message - she doubts his integrity this love of her life, a whirlwind romance.
Did I initiate the friend request, or did he? she asks, she is about to marry this man and needs to know his intentions?
Why not ask the love of her life?
Why the doubt?
Why no trust?
Why would she question a complete stranger and believe that answer as opposed to the man she agreed to marry?
I apologised and reassured her that I was the initiator, that there had been no communication and that I was gone and wished them both well.
And I do wish them well, either it will be absolute bliss or absolute hell, either way they will provide each other with the best opportunity to learn about love and trust.